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Thursday, November 10, 2011

Grace on my Heart

I borrowed this from a friend on FB

Teacher Debbie Moon's first graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had a different hair color than the other members. One of her students suggested that he was adopted. A little girl said, 'I know all about Adoption, 'I was adopted..' 'What does it mean to be adopted?', asked another child. 'It means', said the girl, 'that you grew in your mommy's heart instead of her tummy!'
I have been in the field of foster care and adoption since 2001.  I have learned a lot and have grown more than I can describe!  But I used to say "that is why I am the caseworker and you are the foster parent" because I always admired what my foster parents did day to day in all their work.  I NEVER thought I would have the heart, parenting abilities and patience to be a foster or adoptive parent. I also felt that as the years went by I KNEW too much about the workings of foster care to be able to adopt through the foster care system.

Then I became a parent....wow, I can not believe what parenting will do to you and how GOD changes your heart and mind for his purposes! So now Jesse and I want more children and for many reasons, some of which are our own mistakes, we are having trouble having more biological children.  Again, I NEVER thought I would say I would be interested in foster care and adoption.  I used to say "God will have to lay a lot of GRACE on my heart to bring me to foster care to adopt."  Hmmmm....ask and you will receive!  HA!  I didn't know I was asking!

But here I am, God laid tons of Grace on my heart and has brought me to the place in my life that scares the crap out of me but gives me hope that I can do anything THROUGH HIM!!!!

Part of the grace that God laid on my heart was through the cute puppy that lays on my lap as I type this! Lucy, who we rescued/adopted last new year.  She is sweet and lovable but has her challenges and you can tell she was not always treated right, which is so sad.



Another piece of God's grace was through my own daughter, Savannah!  She has gone through trauma and tragedy over the past two years and we have been there for her every step of the way. But it has been such a difficult road.  However, on this road God has taught me many things, one small thing was that I have the ability to support my child through trauma. Which of course added more Grace to my heart.  It got me thinking if I can help my child through trauma, couldn't I do it for other children???

More pieces of God's grace came through my job.  I have had the privilege of working with some FANTASTIC and wonderful foster and adoptive parents that have given me hope that I can do it too.  One family that adopted a very special little girl. This little girl has blossomed beyond belief because of her wonderful adoptive family and GOD!  Then there was another professional that I worked with, she stepped up and became a foster parent. However, she has had to endure a lot of CRAP in the foster care system but keeps going strong and shows endless love to her foster child.  Both of these families have continued to give me hope, hope to what could be the best and most challenging decision of our lives!!!

There have been many other small doses of Grace that God has laid that I do not have enough time or room to tell you about, but trust me when I say it has been a lot of Grace!  I also have to give my wonderful and supportive family and close friends credit for helping me see the Grace that God has laid on me!

Through these many things, I can no longer ignore or try to avoid the big piles of GRACE that God has laid on my heart...So last night we got our application and are going to start the process of becoming foster parents.  WOW! As much as I know SO much about the foster care/adoption field it still scares me to be starting this process, but if I haven't learned it by now, GOD will show me the way!

My favorite bible verse sums it up for me.....Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know what I have planned for you,' says the LORD. 'I have plans to prosper you, not to harm you. I have plans to give you a future filled with hope."

God willing we will be expanding our family!